It is done.

This picture is of my last sunset in Auroville. I spent my last 10 days back 'home' in Auroville, seeking rest and seeking closure. It was needed time and I enjoyed the opportunity. Sarah joined me for the last 3 days I was there, and we visited the beach one last time.

Now, after 24 hours of travel, I am back home. I was greeted with love and good food to fill both my heart and my belly. Then I promptly passed out around 7 pm, sleeping deeply and waking to the feeling of being in a strange place.

There is certainly no way to speak of my experiences in India beyond what this blog has conveyed, and even these entries fall far short of those ineffable truths that occured there, then. For this is here, now, and the truths held in this moment are their own, unique and yet bounded inextricably to every moment before this one. Who can put words to these truths but poets and mystics?

While the initial intention of this blog was to follow my time in India, I have decided to continue it for the time being as I craft my thesis. This blog will then follow my apprenticeship at Sirius Community (www.siriuscommunity.org) and my final semester at Hampshire College where I will be authoring a work entitled 'The DharmaFarmer'. So please, check back as you will and I will keep up to date as I have the chance. Thank you for all your heartfelt comments that helped me through my time abroad.

peace and ease,
justin

The wind whips my face as the earth glides by 120 kilometer an hour
I watch spectator-like--specter-like--removed and distanced
Now it shifts and I am the landscape, fully immersed and intimate
Switching betwwen dual and non-dual
I am overwhelmed
This has been my journey
Forgetting and remembering my Self
This- a breathless test- a wind swept mess- a mercy quest-
This-for me-is India

As I look out on the deep dusk racing by, I wonder if I have changed
If I am 'different' or 'better' now.
Yet truly the one lesson that I have so gracefully recieved here-
over and over-
is that nothing need change,
not myself or the world-
Let Go and Let Be
the ancient masters said.
Indeed, fully accepting things as they are-their 'thusness-is synonymous with enlightenment.
It is this truth that has aided and guided me here-
so, if only in an ironic way,
I have changed in my realization of the illusion of change.
We have all already arrived, for we have never left.
Now the quest-ion remains; who are we and what is this place we have never left?

Change of Change of Plans

Vanakum good friends!
Much has occured since my last post. I did indeed arrive in Darjeeling and i did indeed have a nice cup of tea, but Darjeeling is where I stayed. There, many things happened. First, the mountains of Darjeeling are breathtaking, and often the town is wrapped in the mists of passing clouds. These clouds would literally hit the side of the mountain and rip into pieces and just make the place all shangri-la-ish. When this phenomenon was coupled with tibetan monks walking around everywhere chanting continuously and prayer poles waving in the wind, my internal dialogue would be saying, 'whole other world'. There was such a mix of cultures: south and north indian, muslim, nepali, tibetan, chinese, sikkimese, and a large backpacker crowd. so many kinds of good food!

Second, i have a knee injury. I sustained in at BodhiZendo, where i was sitting for long periods. I realized in Darjeeling that, while my knee was re-gaining strength, it is deeply injured, and i feel the need to respond more drastically now. I also got some sort of alien strep throat that laid me low for about a week.

Third, our good friend Doug Olds is getting married in late June.
While in Darjeeling, i decided to cut my stay by 20 days and return to Auroville for the last 15 days or so to 'prepare for re-entry'. If you don't angle yourself just right, you hit the atmosphere and burn up; so i'm told.

Yet really in reflection, something just changed in me; i felt the time was ripe. 4 1/2 months in India and I now feel saturated. I am ready.

So i will be home by june 10th, resting with friends and family before returning to the Pioneer Valley for my Sirius Apprenticeship. I look forward to good food and good people, punctuated by good stories.

Ok, that's all. Unfortunately, i lost my usb cable and cannot upload any pictures of Darjeeling, but they will be up soon enough.

Be well-seen you soon,
justin

Travelling Changes

Well, like everything in India, my plans have changed a wee-bit. Instead of travelling around the south-west, I am going to the north-east. It is face-meltingly hot here in Auroville and basically everywhere but the coasts and the mountains. So I have decided to take a two day sleeper train to Kalkata (Calcutta) and then to Darjeeling (for a nice cup-o-tea) and then into the mountainous region of Sikkim. Sikkim is located at the foothills and indeed foot-knees of the Himalayas, nestled between Nepal and Bhutan. Both the political and environmental climate are very nice for travellers, and Sarah and I will be staying there for 2 or 3 weeks. The idea is to relax in the cool climate and do some trekking along the beautiful Himalayan frontier. After this it will be back to Auroville for my last week or two.

All is well, I am currently alone, just resting up and digesting some of the memories of the program, preparing to leave for Chennai on Sunday morning. BodhiZendo was an incredible experience that I would recommend to anyone. Father Ama Samy is as enlightened a man as I have ever met...by my unenlightened judgement of course.

Well, until next time...peace and ease to all that be.
justin

Some of the group's lovely ladies in mid-pose at Hampi.
The stunning woman in front is Jasmine, with whom I have the deep honor of living with next semester. Joy!

Sarah and I- post feast

Taking Prasad at the Ramana Maharshi Ashram

Ahh, I love train rides. This was an especially fun trip.

Hello my good friends.
Posting on a stop into town. The Living Routes semester ended magically, in a wonderful space deep in a lush valley about 1300 feet above sea level. Ironically, most of us got sick, violently ill i dare say. For myself, i had an intense fever for one night which broke and left me with loose bowls until today. I am in town to get to the hospital for cipro or something of the same. I feel good and am staying hydrated, but i want to take care of my gut ASAP. And truly i am in the best place possible for recovery.

BodhiZendo, which is where i have been for the past few days is a breathtaking retreat center founded by a Jesuit Priest/Zen Master in 1996. I can easily say that it is one of the 5 most beautiful places i have ever been. My time is spent between meditating (4 hours a day), re-reading Lord of the Rings, practicing yoga, sleeping, gardening, eating from the garden, and meeting wonderful travelers looking for the zen experience. It is a wonderful place to decompress from the semester.

Until the next post, peace and ease to you.
justin

The End of Things

So here I sit, at the end of things. 3 months and so many experiences...many answers and even more questions. Our group is heading to KodaiKanal in the south (up in the mountains where we might not sweat 24 hours a day), where we will spend the last week of our program. There we will have our final presentations on our individual definitions of Integral Sustainability-as this has been the theme of our academic work here. My presentation will be the performance of a spi-ritual involving the whole group. I constructed the ritual from different spirtual traditions with the purpose of widening and deepening our understanding of our inherent connections on the level of person, community, and cosmos. It should be interesting.

In KodaiKanal, we will be staying at an organic farm/preserve called Elephant Valley nestled within the mountian folds. We will be doing hikes into the mountains and doing group celebrations to help bring closure to our shared experience in India.

It has been so difficult here, and just as incredible. Forget academics- just existing in India, finding one's balance here is in itself a monumental task. I am very much looking forward to my free traveling after the progam. I really want to get deep into this place, and I feel that I can only really do this when there is no safety/structural net of the program underneath me.

I don't know when my next update will be; I am not sure when I will have internet access. I will be at Kodai until the 28th, and then I will be on a Zen retreat until the 7th. Most likely my update will come after this.

I am looking forward to sharing my stories and lessons when I return. I think often of 'coming home', so it seems to me that India is not the place for me, at least not right now in my life. I hope all is well in the rest of the world outside my little bubble.

peace and ease-

So...this is where I am- India. It's pretty big.
I am beginning to plan my post-semester travels. So follow along with me.
Starting in the state of Tamil Nadu, I will be finishing the program in the mountains of KodiKanal. Then I will be travelling immediately to 7 km away to BodhiZendo, a Zen meditation retreat area. I will be there for 10 days, ending on May 7th. From there, I will travel 3 hours south to Madurai, still in Tamil Nadu, to stay at a social justice ashram for a few days. From there, I will be travelling, most likely by train, west to the state of Kerala. Here, I may see some temples and other sights, and may do an ayurvedic treatment of some sort. This ayurvedic treatment is referred to as panchakarma. From here, my loose plans are to continue up the west coast, passing through some Buddhist pilgrimage sites, up into the state of Karnataka. My eventual destination at this point is Goa, where there are many well-known yoga retreat centers. Here I would like to stay for some time doing yoga retreat. Depending on how long all this takes, I may just travel back to Auroville or I may continue north towards Rajasthan, far in the north-west. Eventually I will make it back to Auroville to spend the remaining time working with Krishna at Solitude; preparing as much as I can to see out my thesis when I return to the states.
So that's the plan, sure to change.
one love, one tribe...

Lunar Bloom

Pale, blue rays blazed across clouds-
Moon made trails, the sky sighs aloud
and plays wind up games to pass the time-

Shine! You watery goddess-
Shine! You resplendent, heaven sent, full on flawless Goddes-
I feel your weight- Your pressing pregnant shape-
The long distance abyss travelled sooner for lunar kiss-
Sedate your solar mate with those pale rays-
Inducing change in my cellular shape-

Cultivate in me- Strong, stretching, sonic spree-
Like the Pious Pipal tree- As it reaches down and up simultaneously-
Oh thee I ask- Look down as you pass overhead-
I beseech you to teach me to purify dread
and pacify the intense spread of darkness that comes so quick-

Push back those thick, shrouding clouds- Clouding the sounds celestial-
Coming down, broadcasting orchestral-
Pierce through those worn thin whisps of nimbus strips-
The moon sky tie dye revealing this-
Revelling in the lunar kiss I tilt back my head-
Better ready to recieve the hope bestowing water shed-

Pour down on me- Anoint me- Soak and suffuse me-
I need peace and ease and soul release-
Please, please- Bid me ease- Let me rest caressed by thee-
I fall back exhaling- My frustrated failings-
Giving up my motives- To the higher sky training-

It is all I can do!- Thoroughly wrapped up in you-
You, who shoots truth in full bloom through the overcast gloom-
I'm consumed by you- By your waxing and waning-
By your birth and decaying- You travel the sky sustaining-
Tracing shapes below- Painting mojo flows with your colorful raining-

Fill us all with your liquid color- We, the sisters and brothers-
Smother and drench us in sensuous flooding-
In comes down in torrents from mother so loving-
For in this planetary family- We, the terrestrial progeny-
Give thanks and dance trance under the Pipal tree-
Eternal beauty- Sacred duty-
Let It Be...

A giant chariot/temple-on-wheels thing that is pulled by the Hampi villagers down the main bizzare to the temple on auspicious occasions. Really incredible to watch this event going down.

The view from Hanuman Temple overlooking Hampi

My Retreat Space- Monkey Cave
Humble and Homey

Scrambling over the landscape

Hello.
It's been some time since my last 'real' update. Here is a scenic picture of Hampi, taken from the lookout of my retreat cave. Hampi is beautiful, more so it is magical. It has elements of Escondido hills, Hawaii volcanic rock, Indian palms and bright green rice plants, and a deep and clean water like none other flowing through it. Hampi is the original inspiration for the Jungle Book, and I can see why. It is also the setting for different parts of both the Ramayana and the Mahabharata, India's two main epic poems. Having just arrived, I sat down underneath the shade of a boulder and quickly composed this:

Worn Rock-
Bare top-
Sun above-
Water runs-
Sparse trees-
Cooling breeze-
Feel the ease-
Of Hampi

Even as the Living Routes program focuses intensely on spiritual/personal growth, the Hampi experience hyper focused us as a group and as individuals on this same growth. It was truly exhausting in the best way possible. Here was the first time I have gotten sick since arriving in India. I had, lets say, a micro-brewery in my stomach for about a week; producing sulfurous gas from both ends. I resisted taking antibiotics, instead using a regiment of Neem capsuls and Grapefruit seed extract, then following that treatment with a few weeks of acidopholus to re-establish my gut fauna.

I understood my sickness to be a purging of sorts as it came right after our sacred solo. A little bit more detail, the sacred solo was 40 hours of fasting and seclusion up in the caves of the tumbled Hampi hills. These very caves have been used for thousands of years by rishis and sadus to attain to the divine, and needless to say the experience was quite difficult and rewarding. I will post a few more pictures of Hampi following this.
om namo bhagavate!
justin

Hello again.
This is the section of the blog that i have entitled, "wow, check that shit out!"
Today we have a picture of a nice-sized hooded cobra swallowing whole the biggest toad i have seen yet since arriving. This was taken at Solitude farm by me (zoomed in from a safe distance).
Hopefully I'll have further installments of this wonderful piece. See you space cowboy...

So here is a picture of me with a sadu (holy person) in the Manakshi temple in Madarai. Madarai was the historical capital of Tamil Nadu and is no less than 1000 years only. Incredible tradition in this city; also at present incredible poverty, famine, congestion, pollution, and suffering. It was very difficult being here because overwhelmingly my interations were with old beggars and homeless children. Also there were many holy sights and experiences here that i am so grateful to have had. One day as I walked around the outskirts of the city temple part of me cracked. There was an old, bearded sadu sitting on the sidewalk with a single lower robe, a water bottle, and a sitting cloth. I watched myself walk over to him, give him a 5-rupee coin, and sit down next to him. Many people were watching me as i got into half-lotus and sat next to him for about an hour. The experience pulled and loosened things in me, and i wrote some spoken word to connect back to it.

The Sadu on the Sidewalk

Old, aging, ancient-the sadu on the sidewalk trains patient-
the vedic equation maintains pain as latent statements of ego placement-
always jumping- tree, tree-branch, branch-vine, vine-
I, I-me, me-mine, mine-
this the mind monkey made- untamed and untrained and going grey with old age-
Shiva! he shouts under his breath in a whisper-that only i can hear-
Literally-
this beggar in raggedy robes blessing the droves of drop dead souls and silent heros-
The city lights-the world sights-they pass him by-
he steps aside-no pride to hide-he wants the world to see-
that yogi-that sadu-that bhakta-that sage-
I and I praise that truth seeker-go deeper, go deeper-don't hesitate
fly higher, burn brighter-this our shared sacred fate!-
as i sit on the sidewalk and slowly go sane-

Made sane by way of knowledge-knowledge of the soul-
soul the stage-stage the place-which plays the living show-
so on the street are people walking and smoking and shopping-
cows grazing trash-cars honking-
I try open eyed to gaze unmoving-so much variety flying by-
dogs, cows, bums, rickshaws and slackjaws-all staring at my singular grooving-
they flow i-they mingle and mix-they move out of sight in their own time-
some slowly, some quick-some healthy, some sick-but always moving, ever moving...
this is the trick!- this is the game-all thoughts the same-all feelings the same-
in that they continue on...varied in expression-still they sing the same song-
impermanence-

The problem is that we make mistakes and take those dogs and cows and passing people as equal-equal to I, me, mine-
We forget that we are the sadu on the street-
smiling through rotting teeth-serenly watching the scene-
'This show is dream!' he says-a gentle mental stream of word thought and sun beam-
the sadu knows this and suffers no pain-it is we that choose to say in the deep drama rain-
complaining insane thinking we're on the stage-thinking actor and witness are one in the same-
Hey!-we are one-we are the same-
but you can't think this-its intrinsic-innate existence-
the sadu gets high on this-from his eyes stream bliss-cause the dream is seen for what it is-

In breath-out breath-come to rest-feel fresh-
abide residing deep in the chest-the heart beat pressed against the breast-
and the man wrapped in robes is the first to attest to the true gain-
release from the cycle-release from pain-
release from endless wandering in vain-
as i sit on the sidewalk and slowly go sane...

Hello my friends

First off, here is a picture of me-as requested-in action at the farm (spreading straw on the newly seeded peanut field).Wicked huh? Yea, i'm pretty indian out here. Actually that day i got a sunburn cause this sun is no joke. By the way, i am wearing a 'loongi', a south-indian type of male skirt. I'm wearing it up in shorts form cause its hot, but it can be worn down to the ankles and is very fun and flowing.

So our group is leaving for Hampi in just a day. Hampi is a small, secluded area near Bangalore where an eco-ashram has been built. We will be there for 10 days, and then we will travel not too far to another ashram called fireflies; we will be there for 5 days. So for the next 15 days I will most likely be out of touch all together.

I love these opportunities to travel. We get to take overnight trains and experience the true heart of India. I still hear the 'train mantras' spoken at bullet-speed in quick succession by the merchants making rounds on the train. Here are just a few:
"Sappadu Bhiryani, vegetable bhiryani, sappadu, sappadu bhiryani"
"Chai, chai, teeeeee, chai, masala chai"
"poori, poori, vadai, onion vadai"

We travel for a full 24 hours and as such a big group we always attract attention.